Monday, January 24, 2011

I'm Like An Unexperienced Veteran...

I haven't been feeling well lately. The late hours that I'm working are bad enough, but the sleepless nights I have due to these "dreams" are making it exponentially worse. These dreams, I think I believe that they're real now, that they are from the past, perhaps from me in a previous life. I know, that sounds ridiculous and crazy, but I really think that's what the situation is at the moment. However, I still don't understand their meaning, or why they're coming to me now... Or maybe I do. I'm not sure anymore.

The thing that's really bothering me isn't the dreams themselves, but what they're causing me to think about. Things like running of to some place that I have no idea where it's located, or going to grab an item that I know for a fact that I don't own; or even, committing acts that, well, wouldn't sit well with today's society... it's almost as if, it's a natural instinct, if you can put it that way; I don't know. All I know is that these dreams are really messing with me... and the dreams, well, they're getting worse. The events that happen in the dreams are becoming more and more horrible and terrifying. And the man... the tall man, he's always there when the worst happens, standing not too far off, or sometimes right there in front of me. But, now that I think about it, he feels sort of... familiar to me; and not in that warm, homely feel: more like, the terror that you have always felt you entire life, that terror of the unknown, or like the terror that a child feels when he is lying in his bed awake at night, afraid of the darkness, and not knowing if something is there in that darkness, waiting to get a hold of him. That is what I feel, whenever I see him in those dreams...

I want to find a way to stop all this insanity; I want to figure out why this is happening, and what is causing it. Hopefully, some answers will come to me, soon.


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